How The American Male In Brooklyn Pays Rent

An American male in Brooklyn walks down the street. He receives a phone call from his landlord; he does not pick up. Moments later, as he is listening to the voice message, he grimaces. His companion raises her eyebrows. He continues listening and grimacing, and then he hangs up. The rent checks were all rejected, he says, so I have to go deal with that. They all bounced, that’s crazy, she says. No, he says, rejected because my handwriting is illegible. Oh, she says. There is a beat. They keep walking.

I don’t get it, she says. He explains: I am in charge of writing the checks in my house, because my flatmates and I are idiots and constantly late with our rent. And it’s not because we didn’t have the money, though that sometimes happened, yes, but because we’d just forget, and be weeks late. And then my landlord would come over and wake us up really early to write him checks.

She cuts in: Wait, that’s it? He didn’t threaten to kick you out? No, he likes us, he says. Sometimes he comes over and hangs out. But after he started to come over really early and wake us up, I just decided to take their checkbooks and write all the checks out together. So now I’m in control of two grown men’s checkbooks. But sometimes the bank can’t read my handwriting, so the checks get rejected, and then I have to rewrite them.

And that is how The American Male In Brooklyn pays rent.


Photo Credit: flickr/rufusowliebat



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