Spam With a News Peg (Genius)

This email showed up in my inbox yesterday. At no point was I tempted to send this person money, but until the, oh, third paragraph (“There are two options by which this transaction can be delivered.”), I definitely was thinking about how I’d edit this letter to run on the website as a true tale of fortunes made and lost in wartime. Editorial integrity: High.

Hello Sir,

I am Ehab Al-shaer, a Syrian citizen, residing in London. My father was killed in Homs city of Syria and his business office burnt down because of his support to the rebels (The Syrian National Council) who is currently fighting to liberate the good people of Syria from the misrule of President BasharAL- Assad. The rebel leaders have tried all they could to persuade President Bashar AL- Assad to conduct a free and all inclusive election but he refused and decided to go to war against the citizens he is pretending to govern. If President Bashar AL- Assad thinks that he is popular, he would have accepted to have a transitional committee and general election will be conducted and who wins will at-least bring peace to Syria.

Anyway, let me not take your time with the situation in Syria as my family was mostly affected. I lost my father- Sheik Ahmed Al-shaer, his company in Damascus and most of the family’s asset because the forces royal to President Bashar AL- Assad claimed that my father is supporting and financing the rebels and as such, I had to escape Syria with my wife and children to Lebanon and from there to London where my father had huge sum of money in London bank which was formerly frozen but were recently lifted by the British government, so that I can invest the funds with overseas partners because in Syria the political turmoil appeared to be continued for a long time. Honestly, I want to invest and make use of the money in your country, as we all are aware that the crisis still continues in Syria and I cannot also invest in UK due to their double-tax regime.

There are two options by which this transaction can be delivered. The funds can be wired from bank to your account or can be delivered in cash by a financial diplomat to your country and I can assure you that the transaction is a hitch-free type. Please let me know the method by-which you can work with us, so that we can commence action.Please feel free to contact me.

Let me stop here, hoping that you will respond promptly.

Thanks for your anticipated cooperation.

Remain Bless,
Ehab Al-shaer

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