Happy Birthday From Our Corporation!

The first to wish me a happy birthday was my Optometrist. Love the clipart from the ’90s.

 

And then the insurance company where I get my renters insurance. The next day they asked me if I wanted life insurance, which, come on.

 

Have you guys seen the products that your bank lets you purchase with points? Besides discounted movie tickets, which are actually useful, there are things like weird plastic jewelry and the kind of shirts your grandpa wears. Actually, maybe I’ll get something for my grandpa.

 

I liked being RECOGNIZED as a saver. Thanks to the company former known as ING Direct!

 

They couldn’t wait to celebrate by giving me a coupon for 15 percent off.

 

Whatever you think of Starbucks, they do it right by giving you a coupon for a free drink that you have 30 days to use after your birthday. Good job Starbucks marketing team.

 

If I wanted to get a haircut on my birthday and if they sent this to me, like, a month before instead a few days before my birthday, this would have been great.

 

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